Since I have nothing new to report, I thought I'd share one of my favorite stories...
Dad goes out partying with his friends on a Saturday night. In the morning he has to drive Grandma Hays to church because she doesn't know how to drive. They pull up to a stop sign and they both look over to the ditch where my dad's best friend, Roy's car is abandoned and parked.
Grandma Hays turns to Dad and says: David? Why'd you pee on the door last night?
Dad: What door?
Grandma Hays: My bedroom door.