Monday, August 30, 2010

Dad's Birthday

Yesterday was my dad's 55th birthday. I called him to say, "Happy Birthday." It was a short conversation. His friend Bernie was at the house.

Dad: Bernie's here.
Me: Cool.
Dad: He got me a card. It's PG.
Me: It's PG?
Dad: Well, it would be rated R if you removed the black dots.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009


My stepsister recently had a little boy. They live with my dad and his wife. He's never been around a baby this much in his entire life.

Dad: I walked over to his crib and he was just laying in there crying, so I said, "Crybaby."

Monday, August 10, 2009


Dad: I'm not a Republican. I just vote like one.


Emailed my dad to let him know I'd be stopping by the house on Sunday. I was excited to see my first cat, Phoebe.

Me: Tell Phoebe I'll be there on Sunday.
Dad: She has been informed.

Monday, April 13, 2009

The end.

Well, he's gone. We had a nice drive to St. Louis. 

While listening to Paul Simon, he turned it up and said, "This almost makes me wish I had rhythm." We also listened to a Mitch Hedberg stand-up CD. He enjoyed that as well. 

Driving past a bus stop on Western Ave...
Dad: She must be a detective.
Me: That one in the leather jacket?
Dad: Yeah. She's wearing heels. All the female detectives on TV wear heels.  

When we got to St. Louis, we went to O'Connell's to eat. I have to say this way the perfect ending to our 10  months together. Sitting in a big wooden booth at my favorite bar in  St. Louis, drinking beer and eating burgers with my dad.

Now, I think I may have to start a blog about all the crazy shit my mom says to me on the phone. She had a great line this weekend. 

Saturday, April 11, 2009


Me: Hey, Dad. Are you excited for our road trip?
Dad: (sigh) Have you ever really seen me excited?

Wednesday, April 8, 2009


Last night I was in the kitchen making dinner. Joe was on his way over. Dad comes in the kitchen, scares the shit out of me, and then sits down to talk about this Paul Simon/Steve Martin audio clip I sent him earlier in the day.

Joe shows up and walks in the kitchen. 

Dad: Hi, Joe. (pause) You know, I've known her (me) a lot longer than you. In fact, I bet I've seen her naked more than you have.